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Dawn Marie Lamonica
EXECUTIVE COACH | SPEAKER | RETREATS
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09 APRIL
Hey ladies!
Happy day after some kind of EPIC total solar eclipse here in the USA – we are all still alive (not sure that is a good thing because this country is pure bananas atm) – but hey ho. What is a solar eclipse? When the Moon passes between Earth and the Sun, obscuring the Sun completely.
It all gets very……surreal. Since the Sun does a whole bunch of important things – weird stuff happens like the sky goes black, the tides in the ocean change, atmospheric pressure drops, sounds of nature dramatically change (because animals don’t know what time of day it is anymore) and circadian rhythms jump (way) off their beat.
In ancient times (yes, I am a history freak) our ancestors were highly superstitious and viewed total solar eclipses with trepidation and fear. Some thought they were dire portents from the gods, indicating the deities' displeasure — others thought the sun was being consumed by dragons.
I really was hoping for a Dragon because I absolutely loved Daeneyrs from Game of Thrones but.... alas no wings in the sky.
Anyway – we are all still here.
IN THE NEWS
First - in case you are thinking - oh Dawn.... we don't have to meet in person - what's all of this urgency about? I'd like to call your attention to the McKinsey Oct 2023 Women in the Workplace Report done in partnership with LeanIn.Org.
"Women are more ambitious than ever, and workplace flexibility is fueling them. Yet despite some hard-fought gains, women’s representation is not keeping pace."
McKinsey's report is on the USA but we both know the plight for women in the UK, especially in the Finance sector, is worse.
ON A BRIGHTER NOTE - let’s congratulate Vivienne Artz as the new CEO of the FTSE Women Leaders Review, the UK’s business-led voluntary framework, supported by the government to improve the representation of women on the Boards and Leadership teams of the FTSE 350 and 50 of the UK’s leading private companies. You can read more here.
HOW I WORK
See what I did above?
I will ALWAYS share with you other ways you can connect with strong, smart women if you decide PRIME membership or the events aren’t for you – because I believe in the COLLECTIVE power of women and I believe in COLLABORATION.
I also believe the time is NOW.
We need to start meeting and talking about money, impact and change - to start talking AND ACTING on REAL strategy to get there. We need to start talking about business – how we are going to give each other business. NOW.
I believe PRIME will land where it is supposed to if I continue to serve. And I have learned SO much in this launch process (holy mary!).
ON LAUGHTER
You are all high performers – extremely accomplished women. I was thinking a lot lately on the dichotomy, sometimes, between innate DRIVE and LAUGHTER. Between the serious and the silly.
I use laughter in a very unique way - thought to share it here. I also firmly believe it supports high performance. And in fact, my studies on biochemistry and neuroscience support this assertion.
Here’s what I mean.
Laughter can buoy you through ANYTHING.
In times of crisis, anxiety or when things are falling apart (quickly) – it is the thing that will hold you afloat.
When I worked as an interim exec in regulation and compliance I would have these short contracts but I would always make myself known quickly….. with a few “markers” including…. my laughter.
I was told I had this HUGE laughter that could carry across any the floor of any private equity firm or hedge fund.
And I guess those are places where there is not much laughter… so it was one of the things…. the unique things...I would quickly get known for.
I laugh like a 5 year old. That is just how God made me.
Here is why LAUGHTER is so damn important - corporate life is often, in a word, insane.
It is intense to say the least (!)
You will see crises arise out of nowhere, you will see grown *ss adults act like toddlers, you will see tantrums and passive aggressive emails, toys hurled out of prams and nonsense that would make a 3rd grade teacher frown so deeply it would jeopardize her botox.
You must LAUGH at the absurdity of it.
Because it is absurd.
The laughter is a coping mechanism. It will also chemically LIFT you up. And when you are “more up” biochemically, you can think more clearly and quickly about solutions.
Versus get swept into the drama you will see the situation for what it is.
Laughter is also a KPI I would look for when analyzing Executive Committee members – those members who were laughing the most on any ExCo almost always had more power/sway than anyone else on the table.
They were usually also more successful at life overall (call that money but I define success slightly differently and won’t jump down that rabbit hole here).
Those on any ExCo who were laughing were the people I knew if I needed change (on anything) I had to win over. I would then study WHO they smiled and laughed WITH – then this would tell me the allegiances, loyalties and relationships.
It is the subtle clues I always looked for. Laughter would tell me who on the ExCo had reason to laugh and sometimes, who had the healthiest relationships at home and therefore were more approachable on harder organizational change topics in the office. Its shocking folks, I know, but I was always a force of change. 😉
I used laughter all of the time in business.
In personal life – if I am laughing with someone within the first 1-2 interactions I know we are going to be friends for life. To this day - my “ride or die” friends – these are people I laugh with easily.
LAUGHTER bonds you to another person.
You cannot force it.
It is a KPI of that person GETTING you – you GETTING them – it’s a spontaneous, authentic, bond.
A connection like no other.
When I laugh with someone deeply – I never forget it – never.
And when I need to think on something to make me smile (if the clouds in my life are gathering, as they flipping DO) – I visualize and remember and FEEL the feeling of the two of us laughing like hyenas.
It is also a question I will often ask clients in coaching if and when we are dealing with some heavier material.
I will say “when was the last time you really laughed?”
And this can make people … uncomfortable. But there is a method that I follow for a reason – I get results. Often if we are talking about issues at home I will say “when was the last time you laughed with your wife/husband?” – oooooh and this gets 'em every time. The pause. The consideration.
It is SO important.
Laughter.
It is the buoy no one talks about.
Finally, before I go to sleep, if I have too much on my mind or feel anxious about work I will flip on a stand-up comedian. (I actually spend many hours studying comedians for their stage presence and communication skills – they fascinate me).
Before I go to sleep I know I am closest to my subconscious state - my brain is about to clean itself up and rewire stuff and do a whole bunch of important tasks. I have to “prime” – yes I just said that – my brain and body with the right neurochemicals IF I want peak performance type of sleep.
SO I watch something that will make me laugh for 20-30 minutes.
Lately – its been Trevor Noah. This man is sheer genius and his COMEDY – I am thoroughly addicted. I think I might be in love with him.
I also adore Iliza Shlesinger and Taylor Tomlinson. There is a genius in comedy that is undeniable.
Give watching some before you sleep – a try.
In closing.
LAUGHTER IS POWERFUL beyond measure – just. like. you.
It is underestimated.
Do not underestimate it.
Laugh. More.
I hope to see you 18 APRIL at 8 am in MAYFAIR (location will be announced in the next few days).
If only 5 people show because I did not promote this event enough with a long enough runway – that will NOT be a laughing matter (!) – but I promise you – I WILL find the humor in it, I always do – because that my lovelies is how I live life. (Oh - and I’ll drink all of the champagne).
Prime is very much a grass roots effort. It is in a fledgling stage. If you have checked out the latest on the website and really feel like this could inspire your friends, colleagues, etc - please take action to keep the momentum moving!
